Empowered Traditionalist

Writer and guest blogger Margaret Everton conducts a week-long experiment on why we really are what we wear.

I will never forget my middle school tennis partner who, before one morning bell, professed, “The clothes don’t make the person; the person makes the clothes.” The aloofness was cool, the adage wise. But she didn’t believe herself. I knew how many outfits she had tried on that morning.

I didn’t believe her either, and scoffed for years at such trivialization of the role that attire plays—yet I wonder. Am I putting too much emphasis on the impact that clothes can have? As long as I look clean and covered, how can clothes determine how I navigate through this world? As a freelance writer, I can wear whatever I want. So I will. I will document one week of my life wearing only my black track suit to determine if what I wear matters.

DAY 1
Track suits are underrated. Slimming, collar up: I’m Jackie Kennedy ready for tennis. Refreshing to put no effort into myself. This could become my uniform. I feel fine. I think I’ll get tea.

DAY 2
Husband: Do you have a cold? [Glancing at my outfit]
Me: No. This might be my new uniform. Might be the new me. It’s function-meets-comfort.
Husband: Meets pajamas.

DAY 3
Slouch clothes. Fun for the ol’ college slouch day. Not so fun when I’m trying to feel professional and serious on a phone interview I’m conducting.

DAY 4
What are the odds that this week I run into a girl from high school? Former rival dancer now guest lecturer at the local university. And I had wanted to appear so on top of the world if ever we reunited. Did I detect smugness in her smile? Seriously, what are the odds?

DAY 5
I’ve been in this clothing store for ten minutes and no employee has approached me. I’m invisible, unkempt. A woman with poise (and a killer pink scarf) just entered—she owns the room. Like moths to a flame, the three employees approach her. I slink away between two racks of sweaters and leave the store.

DAY 6
Groceries. Tea and—nooooooo. The wife of my husband’s colleague. She can’t see me like this: sloppy, not on top of my game enough to match her lawyer-turned-stay-at-home-mom intelligence and verbal wit. Jeans, boots, cream sweater—her simplicity approaches brilliance. Turn away. I can hang at the back of the store until she leaves. Drop the tea and walk slowly away. No, drop the tea and run.

DAY 7
The end of the day and the experiment is finally over. Jeans, blouse, vintage satin clutch for dinner with my husband. Wow, he says, you look amazing. Confidently I enter the restaurant. A woman taken seriously. I admit that I expected to determine that clothes do matter, but I didn’t anticipate to discover why. Conscious dressing can get bad press as materialism exemplified, but clothes that reflect our identity boost our confidence. Whether we’re most at home in a wool gabardine suit and heels or yoga pants and a tank, we should represent our most authentic self. To any onlooker, I’m just a girl in a shirt, but I sip my Pellegrino and feel like a supermodel. Nobody in the room cares about what I have on; it wouldn’t alter their evening if I still had on my track suit. But it matters. It matters to me.

Clothes Matter, Simplified:
*Well-fitting tailored jeans cover a multitude of sartorial sins.
*Sunglasses and a scarf or hat transform Bad Hair No Makeup Girl into Jackie Kennedy look-alike.
*Voguish purses or shoes exhibit attention to detail and respect for self.
*Vintage costume jewelry creates a uniqueness to an average ensemble.
*A wrap can be a signature piece that serves as a shawl or scarf (and ups the ante) for several
outfits.
*Yes, track suits give grace to those quick errands, that early brunch, or those “off days.”
Just do yourself a favor and don’t wear it seven days in a row.

Check out two scientific studies on how clothes matter:
ABC NEWS
Psychology Today

This is just a pithy introduction. Start thinking along these lines-

What do these have in common?

-According to the Center for Disease control 1 in 4 teenage girls has a STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease)
-“pole-dancing aerobics” or “stripper aerobics” are now available at all the major health and fitness clubs.
-The demise of the dinner table. Few households eat dinner as a family anymore
-Babysitting, Daycare, Nannies, in home potty-trainers and sleep-nurses.
-Girls Gone Wild.
-Gillette’s latest razor, “The Goddess”
-When Helen Reddy accepted her Grammy award for her song “I AM WOMAN” she concluded her speech by thanking God “because SHE makes everything possible”.

These are all direct or indirect results of radical feminism. If you are like me you probably know precious little about feminism and it’s impacts. But the truth is, every woman alive today is profoundly affected by Feminism and its ramifications. This issue is crucial because,

It is the women who have an understanding of the past who can discern a path for the future.

Ladies, get ready for a thorough, albeit concise, introduction to Feminism and what to do about it.

I grew up wearing sensible shoes.

They were called “Buster Browns” in the day, and they served my Catholic school uniform( with the chubbette expando-waist band) quite well.

I don’t know when the day-dream began, maybe it was Dorothy’s sparkle slippers in Oz, but I had always wished that I were a Red High Heel. You know the kind of person who wears them. She turns heads, she enters a room with vibrant assurance and she owns it! She is beautifully bold, she can think on her (pretty) feet, she is magnetic and daring, she exudes confidence. Most of my young adult years were spent comparing myself to my female counterparts who seemed to walk in these qualities. The dark brooding envy stayed with me well into my forties. I covered it up with good Christian principles, but I knew and God knew.

“God! I want to be a Red High Heel!”

One morning, walking to the mailbox, I shouted,” God, I want to be a Red High Heel!” And He answered: “ Well, you aren’t and you won’t, so stop asking!”

“Look at your feet Jane, you are a comfortable sneaker. You are what people find non-threatening, you are my secret agent—and you can get behind the lines of defense and mistrust. You will always be a well-worn shoe…but take a look at Who is walking in them, guiding you, anointing you, blessing you, and loving others through you. It doesn’t get better than this! “

-So now, I still love red shoes. If you have a pair, I will beg them from you if they are my size, but I’m smiling inside. I know what God tells me about all of us. Look again at Who is wearing them.

___________________________________
I was sharing dinner with Jane and her husband and this story surfaced as I was slipping on my “red shoes” to leave. Dear Jane then graciously wrote it down for me to share with you all. Thank you Jane!

Wimpy theology makes wimpy women.

The opposite of a wimpy woman is NOT a loud, boisterous, uppity, vocal,pushy, brash, controlling, sassy Amazon!

The opposite is-

14 year old Marie Durant, arrested for being a protestant and imprisoned. She was told “You can get out for one phrase! “I abjure”.

and she wrote on her prison wall, “I resist” and stayed there for 38 years till she died doing just that.

Gladys Staines
Another opposite is Gladys Staines, 1999, spent 3 decades serving, with her family, the lepers of India. One day she heard the news that her husband, Graham, and little Philip (10) and Timothy (6) had been set on fire, burned alive in the back of their car- she had one message to the people of India:
“I am not bitter, neither am I angry. Let us burn hatred and spread the flame of Christ’s love.” Her young daughter Ester, (13) said: “I praise the Lord that he found my father worthy to die for Him.”

That is a True woman.

Margaret Lauchlison & Margaret Wilson
The opposite of a wimpy woman is the older Margaret and her young friend of the same name. During the “Great Ejection” in Scotland both were arrested for proclaiming Christ. Margaret Lauchlison was tied to stake well out from the beach as the younger Margaret Wilson was forced to watch. The tidal waters began to overwhelm her. The soldiers offered to save her if only she would say “God save the King!” She replied insistently, “God save him if He will, for it is his salvation that I desire.” This did not satisfy the men.

The soldiers then took the young Margaret and tied her as well. “Will you recant?” the solders asked for the last time. “No,” she said “because I love the Lord.” and with that she continued reciting Scripture until the waters totally engulfed her.

Kimmy
The opposite of a wimpy woman is Kimmy Harris, who, while bearing her first child found her baby to have a dangerous heart defect. After little baby “Faith” was born, Kimmy and her husband underwent numerous hospital visits, moved from home to receive further medical expertise, suffered and wept and prayed. God saw fit to take their little darling home early, just a few short months after her birth. Kimmy’s heart harbors no bitterness.

Wimpy theology does not give a woman a god big enough, strong enough, wise enough, good enough to handle the realities of life in a way that enables her to magnify Him and His Son all the time.

He’s not big enough. Our view of God is warped by our “woman-centeredness” (aka as “man-centeredness)

But having a true view of God and His divine Sovereignty leads to a mind-boggling understanding of true womanhood and the courage to walk in it.

Whether married or single, Don’t settle for wimpy theology. Don’t waste your womanhood.

_________
I stand on the shoulders of John Piper and Susan Hunt as I share this. Dr. Piper shared a powerful session on The Ultimate Meaning of True Womanhood and I share some of his insights here. I share the story of the two Margaret’s from Susan Hun’ts book “By Design”

I’m going to predict the future. One of you is likely to come up with a whale of an idea for my business. but don’t worry- you’ll get all the glory.

The plain and simple truth is, I, as a budding business owner, need your creative ideas.

So, here’s the scoop:

1. Post any ideas that you can think of for fun, (and hopefully) profitable ideas for Christa-Taylor. And no, giving away free clothes for an entire week- does not count as profitable. Promotions, sales, events, activities - you get the idea.

I know you gals have got the brain juices, and you like to shop- so let’s hear your “heavy revies”!

From Erin at “A Dress a Day”

Facetious? Yes. (please excuse #10 )

1. Drawing your pant legs back from someone in disgust as you pass them is insufficiently scornful.

2. Studies have shown that wearing skirts is 90% effective in preventing VPL (visible panty line).

3. You no longer have to worry about your tush being exposed to the unfortunate individual in the desk behind you. Ditto for the “muffin top” (when your pants hug your hips too tightly and create an unnatural bulge above your pants)

4. Ruffles on a skirt can be over-the-top glamorous. Ruffles on pants are only acceptable if your name is Mary, and a little lamb follows you everywhere you go.

5. It is impossible to smuggle someone in — or out — of prison, a masked ball, a hotel room, etc. by hiding them under your pants. (Plus, there is no such thing as “hooppants.”)

6. When you strap a gun to your thigh in pants, you lose the element of surprise.

7. You don’t have to have skirts hemmed differently for flats or heels.

8. Twirling in a pair of pants results in 87% less happiness.

9. The word “skirt” has both a singular and a plural form, usable by all (”I am wearing a skirt today.” “Instantly Mrs. Bagnet put some pins into her mouth, and began pinning up her skirts all round, a little higher than the level of her grey cloak.”) The word “pants” has a singular that can only be used by fashion-industry people (”Designers are showing a high-waisted, wide-legged pant for fall”).

10. Skirt blowing up, revealing underthings? Flirtatious. Pants falling down, revealing underthings? Humiliating.

continued from part 1
Does the Bible talk about makeup?
Nowhere in the scriptures are we commanded to wear, pursue or apply makeup. But neither does it prohibit it. In fact several women who were honored in scripture took time and attention for their appearance.
The Proverbs 31 woman is dressed is high quality, beautiful clothing
Ester underwent 12 months of beauty treatments, 6 with oil and myrrh and 6 with cosmetics
The Bride in Song of Songs wore jewelry
While these things are not prohibited,
Peter teaches us that our primary attraction should not be our external appearance but the unfading beauty of a meek and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:3,4) We are also told that we are temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor 3:16, 1 Cor 6:20) our bodies are not our own. That excludes all harmful or dangerous procedures. But it also reminds us, we are to beautify His dwelling place. We as women were created from the beginning, to be beautiful. We reflect that aspect of God’s character.
Notice that last phrase: “glorify God in your body”
We need to find out from HIM how we should think about and care for our appearance.
What makeup and how much? What glorifies God!
It all returns to the heart.

Understanding Makeup use:

As far as I see it, there are two types of makeup usage: 1) Concealer and 2) Enhancement

Concealing:
The truth is, blemishes weren’t always the bane of our mornings. There was a time when acne and scarring never tormented a female face, when baggy lids, chapped lips, or blotchy skin were inconceivable. Before the fall, imperfections did not exist. But with the fall came the demise of the perfect world. Our world is broken, waiting for it’s final restoration. While we wait we do our best to camouflage some of the negative effects on our body.
It is foolish to believe that appearances don’t matter at all. For the same reason we exercise or use proper hygiene we also apply our concealer and lipstick. It is perfectly acceptable and even advisable to gently correct some of our facial flaws. Walking about town with “tired eyes” or untreated blemishes does not reflect the beauty of Christ nor enhance our opportunities to share the Gospel.

So we do the bare minimum, what about makeup enhancement?

Applying make-up is a fun, creative activity. It serves the function of an accessory.
There’s nothing wrong with enhancing, or sinful in applying eyeshadow or liner if done in moderation and from a heart that has put Christ first.
There’s nothing inherently bad about a man working out to strengthen his muscles. But spending hours in the gym striving for perfectly defined tone is not a good use of one’s time or body. So with our makeup.
I am an artist, and love expressing my personality through trying different makeup ideas. And honestly, my dad and brothers appreciate it. They see girls in the world wearing it all the time, and it’s nice to come home to a woman who put a little extra into her appearance. (This is a preference only, the men in your life may prefer otherwise)

I would like to close with 1 Cor 10:31
I think we can safely paraphrase the words of Paul, Whether you wear makeup or refrain, whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. “

Occasionally, only occasionally I participate in things of this sort- but I need a break from working so here goes:

7 Random things about me:

1. I play electric guitar and classical piano. I play soccer and love high-heels. I love working so hard I almost die, and I love reading books for hours.  odd contrasts

2. I’ve jumped off 2 waterfalls and gone skydiving

3. I don’t like Chocolate unless it’s dark.

4. I deathly afraid of moths (to create this blog header was torture)

5. I square dance, line dance and swing dance.

6. I’m going to Victoria Canada in the Spring

7. I have a clothing line but can barely sew a bib.

Back to Jen at A Daughter of the King

My dear sister, Hannah Farver, from Beauty From the Heart launched this video in preparation for her book.

It touches an issue many of us are familiar with.

Beauty from the Heart: Faces

Women in America spend 7 billion dollars on cosmetics a year. An average of $100 per woman, per month. That’s a lot of money! From models with airbrushed makeup to Gramma’s who get their eyebrows tattooed, obviously women care immensely about their appearance.

And today, women care more than ever before.

Is this is a biblical desire? What is a Christian stance on makeup?
Our teaching elder, Gregg Harris, remarks “we are to have a “theology” for everything”. What does makeup have to do with the Great commission or showing the love of Christ?
I believe the answer to all of these questions begins with the heart.

Your outward appearance, including your makeup usage is public display of your personal motivation. If your heart is set on serving God, and honoring Him, your appearance will follow. As John McArthur writes:

A woman should examine her motives and goals for the way she dresses. [or wears makeup] Is her intent to show the grace and beauty of womanhood? Is it to reveal a humble heart devoted to worshipping God? Or is it to call attention to herself and flaunt her beauty? Or worse, to attempt to allure men sexually? A woman who focuses on worshipping God will consider carefully how she is dressed, because her heart will dictate her wardrobe and appearance”

Allow me to interject, it is perfectly ok to refrain from wearing makeup altogether! Makeup wearing or not wearing is a liberty for you to decide. But, again, it comes back to the heart. We all must ensure that our choice to refrain is coming from a heart that desires to honor God.

So some questions to ask yourself as your facing your mirror:
-Do I wear makeup to appear older, more professional etc?
-Am I trying to hide some insecurity/dissatisfaction in who God made me?
-When was the last time I thanked God for how He created me?
-Why am I wearing makeup? Whose compliments do I desire or whose approval do I crave?
-Is the amount of time I spend in my makeup and beauty preparation excessive or it God-honoring?
-Do I spend too much on cosmetics or is the amount I spend God-honoring?
-Is my makeup usage point to the beauty of Christ or my fascination with the world?
-Am I showing moderation and self-control or am I distracting others from the inner beauty of the heart?

Once we honestly answer and assess our hearts we are able to move forward in an application and use of makeup that is God honoring.

Part 2, coming Tuesday…