Comments on: No Knights for Sale

By: Felicity

Felicity — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 01:57:25 +0000

Very Interesting Article. I agree with some of the earlier posts, that attraction to your husband is important, However, for me and my husband this came SECOND!

When he first expressed an interest in me, I declined his offer of developing a relationship, and actually prayed God would help him deal with it. Amazingly he trusted God and after much prayer from both of us (I did not want to be attracted to someone who I didn’t have sparks with and whom I felt sure God did not want me to marry). He kindly offered to help me move house. His wonderful character on the day, helping me despite my rejection of him and his Godly character really stood out to me. Long story short, God changed my heart and we are now blisfully entering our 9th month of marriage.

I want to encourage other women, not to put immediate attraction, fireworks and sparks as the first indication to marry someone. Please I implore you to look to the mans character. Over time with prayer, I believe attraction will come, I am deeply in love with my husband now and laugh about the time I didn’t want to enter a relationship with him. However, I implore other women to get to know a mans character. His character will shape the way can lead his wife and family. His love for God and building his wife up in God will be much more valuable than any initial attraction.

Finally, I would encourage all women to enter all relationships with prayer, and if available advise from older Godly women (and men). When God is involved it helps us from being blind to the mans character and helps us from being blinded by initial attraction.

By: anne

anne — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 19:49:17 +0000

Oh wow!!! This is a fabulous article!! Thanks so much for sharing, Christa!!

By: SML

SML — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 04:15:41 +0000

I agree, Christa! However, something I discovered along with sometimes having the tendency to be too picky, was the tendency to forget about becoming the kind of person said ‘knight in shining armor’ would want as well. IOW, it seems like perhaps we as young women should focus more of our attention on becoming the right person instead of just looking for the right person. The right person is gonna want a fellow ‘right person,’ if you know what I mean. IMHO.

By: Hannah Glenn

Hannah Glenn — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 02:10:20 +0000

Lovely reminder- thank you! :]

By: Christa Taylor

Christa Taylor — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 05:33:01 +0000

Take that stuff with a grain of salt, one can get a bit carried away in the application. The best part, in my opinion, is the end where the guys give comments to the girls on how much they appreciate/respect modesty.

By: Natasha

Natasha — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 03:53:24 +0000

I just check out the modesty survey, wow! I had no idea! some of I knew, and stay away from, but I never thought a sheer shirt was imodest….gonna have to revaluate that one! Do you think its still imodest if your wearing another Modest tee unerneath?

By: lasandra

lasandra — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:14:06 +0000

Awesome quote!

By: lasandra

lasandra — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:12:49 +0000

I agree with Kirsten.

Even if you are initially not impressed, even the most “average” looking guy who is deeply in love with God, strong, funny, honest, smart, kind, and treats you like a queen will start to look like “your” knight and shining armor!

Of course, physical attraction is important. But, the basis for that physical attraction doesn’t have to be movie stars.

“The desire of a man is his kindness: and a poor man is better than a liar.” -Proverbs 19:22

By: TanyaBeth S

TanyaBeth S — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 21:47:27 +0000

I’ve got to agree with you there! I have friends whom I said were ugly–until I really got to know them. Since we met I have gotten to know them very well and actually slapped a friend for saying they were ugly. To me, knowing their personality, love for Christ, and sweetness, makes them some of the most handsome young men I know.

By: Marcia Wilwerding

Marcia Wilwerding — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 20:18:12 +0000

It is so refreshing to hear a young woman speaking such wisdom. I have to agree that movies, television, and even some romance novels actually kill a woman’s prospects because they create an image of Mr. Perfect which no man alive can fulfill. The sad irony is that even *if* a man could create himself into such an image, the reality will be hard to handle once the marriage is complete. I’m afraid too many young couples wake up much too late and realize they haven’t married what they thought they were marrying.

My own dearly beloved of 25 years was not my first choice. Yet, it was not his looks, his money, or the way he took command of others. It was his character, his loyalty, his holy life, his genuineness, his love for God and His word, his gentleness with children, his respect for women in general, and his humility, among many, many other qualities, that made him simply irresistible to me.

When I was looking for the man I would spend the rest of my life with, I took the advice of a godly older woman and made a list *before* I started the search. This list was made prayerfully and with an open Bible. I listed the qualities I would want in a man (nothing physical, however) and prayed over that list. I even took it to the alter at church and laid it out before the Lord. I fished that paper out years later after I was married and was delighted to find that my dear husband did indeed fit the criteria perfectly.

If anyone would be interested in our courtship story, it is available for free with sign up for my e-newsletter. However, if you contact me personally, I’ll give it to you without signing up.